Thursday, August 18, 2005

The Hot List

Summer is winding down. I'm feeling a little cranky, and there are far too many rotten things to write about, so I'll shift my focus instead to something completely frivolous, if only for a minute.

So, here is my current list of the 10 most beautiful women in my opinion.

10. Kate Beckinsale -- stunning in The Aviator, luscious in Van Helsing.
9. Keira Knightley -- I think I have a thing for British women, although she's a bit too skinny for me.
8. Jada Pinkett Smith & Beyonce Knowles -- lest you think I don't like Black women. I just like pretty women.
7. Halle Berry -- skinny too, but really pretty.
6. Monica Bellucci -- after peepin' her in a latex dress in The Matrix Reloaded and watching her breast struggle to stay in the red vinyl joint in The Matrix Revolutions, I felt kind of guilty thinking she made a hot Mary Magdalene in The Passion of The Christ, but there was something a bit de Sade-ish about the movie anyway.
5. Jill Scott -- I also like thick pretty women.
4. Halle Berry -- Gorgeous. What the hell was Eric Benet thinking?
3, 2, and 1 -- Catherine Deneuve. Oh, my God. She gets her own paragraph.

Catherine Deneuve is the kind of old broad (not literally, but she will be 62 this year) I would love to be. Actually, she's the kind of old broad my wife will be. Great features, great body, smoky voice, the accent. You want to walk the streets of Paris with her, share a meal with her, drink too much wine, and wake up to have cafe au lait and brioche with her. Like most over-30 lesbians, I saw and loved her in The Hunger, but she's smoldering in 8 Femmes (8 Women), a French murder mystery/musical (you have to see it to get it). Check this out for yourself (she's on the far left, top row). Actually, this one is my favorite.

Okay, after you submit your nominee for hottie, stay tuned. I promise I'll get back to some good old-fashioned ranting before you know it.

2 Comments:

Blogger It's Me, Maven... said...

Do you think Kathleen Turner is the US version of Catherine Deneuve? She's got some of the same features, and definitely has the smokey voice down pat.

10:40 PM  
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11:13 PM  

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